gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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