Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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