My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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