this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Randomize
