Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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