Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize