she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
