No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
