Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize