did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Randomize
