i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Randomize
