My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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