dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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