She said her name was "party"
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
