none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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