Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
