when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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