First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
