So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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