I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
