My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
