just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Randomize
