i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
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