took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize