I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
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So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
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I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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