Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize