She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
