omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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