Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
