This is not my ceiling
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
