Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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