I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
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