it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
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