I wish my penis had an off switch
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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