U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
home. puking in laundry basket.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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