Who did Billy Mays play for?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
