saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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