Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
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