I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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