No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize