But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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