when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
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