this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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