I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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