just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize