Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
