Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize