Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
