Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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