I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
He called his prostate his "boner button".
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Randomize
